Thursday, February 26, 2009

Just say no

to a "relaxing day at the doggie beach" About 6 months ago, my SIL called me to ask if I wanted to bring my 7 year old dog Beau Photobucket and her bulldog puppy Titan to go to the doggie beach. I said "Sure, sounds like fun" So I went to her house and let my dog out of my sons truck. What? You don't think I was getting fur all over MY car did you? My son left.

Titan came over to Beau and immediately tried to hump him. Beau didn't know what to think. Here he is at 80 pounds and this little bitty 30 pound dog is going at his legs. Of course we laughed our asses off as we tried for an hour had no trouble loading them into SIL'S car without much any more humping incidents. We tried putting them both in the very spacious bucket seats back of the car. Yeah.. that wasn't working out to well. Titan kept trying to hump Beau, and Beau couldn't get away. So we put Titan in my lap in the front seat. The next 10 hours 30 minutes of the ride were relaxing exhausting as I tried to keep Titan from going to the back seat raping my poor dog.

Are we there already We finally arrive. We managed to keep them separated as we made our way down to the beach. My dog had never been. He wasn't sure what to think about the water. Titan had been there before, so he loved it. All Beau wanted to do was run up and down the beach, as long as I didn't take him to the water. When I had had enough he was tired, we sat on the beach. Titan immediately came over and tried to rape him once more. So we struggled managed to kept the 2 separated.

Then it was time to leave. THIS is where the fun really started. We loaded Beau in the back seat first. Me on one side of the car, SIL on the other. Both doors open. We put Titan in the front seat, who then IMMEDIATELY jumped to the back seat onto Beau, Beau jumps out of the car to get away, Titan chasing after him. We chase both of them back to the car. Beau was refusing to get the back seat. I had to pull him into the car from the other side. Then I get in, SIL puts Titan on my lap, SIL opens her door to get in, Titan overpowered slips from my grip, jumps to the back seat, Beau jumps out and we do it A GAIN. Finally, we get them both back in, take a Valium because we were so "relaxed" and vowed never to do that E V E R again. I got home and slept for 3 hours.

I am sure we are on youtube somewhere.. many people were once again laughing at me and my troubles getting things into automobiles

16 comments:

Anonymous said...

Bet you wish your husband had Titan's stamina, huh?

Unknown said...

LMAO Mike... he actually DOES.. but he hasn't learn to make it vibrate yet.. we are working on that though

ReformingGeek said...

Hilarious!

Now I'm tired. I think I'll go back to bed and curl up with the cat

No wait. I have to go to work. Damn.

Tuesday Taylor said...

Maybe you should change Beau's name to George Michael! LOL!

SkylersDad said...

A lot of dogs try and mount my dog Yordi at the dog park. They learn right away that is a nono as he spins around, grabs them by the back of the neck and pins them to the ground.

It really is quite the thing to see how fast a large dog can move like that!

Poetry Sue said...

he he he... dogs are funny!! I can't wait till I can get my new puppy... hopefully soon...

Bee (the one who muses) said...

And now I'm going to have Elvis' "You ain't nutin' but a hound dog" in my head all day.

I love dog stories but horny terrorizing dog stories make oh so happy!

Slyde said...

that almost read like a Mad LIb!

The Hussy Housewife said...

I had a bulldog that died last year, and it is funny watching them try to hump of poop since they are built so funny.

I hope you washed your other dog after he prob. got wee wee juice all over his leg.

Mary@Holy Mackerel said...

Wow, sounds like you had an absolute blast!!!

Trukindog said...

Did Titan even give Beau a courtesy butt sniff first?

I mean after all proper canine etiquette should always be observed before humpin!

Unknown said...

RG: Exhausting to read about even? I hope you didn't fall asleep at your desk

Scandy: He was traumatized enough tyvm LOL

Chris: Your dog is a big brave dog. Mine's a little wimpier or he might have done the same.

SUE: What Kinda puppy?

Bee: After I read your comment, I couldn't get that song ouuta my head. Thanks a lot! Watching horny dogs is funny. I have another story about the bulldog I will share another time


Slyde: After I went back and read it, I would have to agree; that whole DAY was a mad lib!

Jamie: I'm sorry about your dog :(


Mary: It was fun, I was just lied to about the "relaxing" part

Truckin.. NOPE no common courtesy whatsoever .. he just went at him

Dawn said...

What a fun day! Is Beau in counseling now to heal the emotional scars?

By the way--how do you do that strikethrough thing? I love it and want to use it, but alas, I am not smart enough to figure it out.

Unknown said...

I want Titan..

Keely said...

lol! That's pretty much how any outing goes with my dog. Except replace the humping with escaping/fighting/whatever flavor of sh*t she feels like stirring up that week...

Kate said...

Poor little guy. My dog is also a humper. She is always trying to hump me or anything else she can wrap her front paws around for that matter. Despite all the humping it sounds like a good day!!

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