Thursday, May 7, 2009

Kids write/say the damndest shit!

My friend has a 5 year old daughter in kindergarten who had to write something about her mom. When her daughter brought it home, she was a little shocked and embarrassed:
























For the record, mom is not 16, she is 20 something, but all of the other kids were saying their moms were 50 and 60. When she was asked, she thought they were all saying 16 so that's what she thought she was supposed to say. The other stuff is pretty normal. the last item, however is what she was most embarrassed. "My mom is funny when she gets on my dad's back" Now, I thought this little girl either walked in on them doing something weird, or that her dad had said "get off my back!" and the little girl heard it. Mom says, "My husband gives me piggyback rides around the house" Yeah suuuuure


Another friend has a 4 year old daughter. One night, her dad was giving her a bath. Before the bath, dad was trying to take out the earrings. The little girl told her daddy that only mommy knows how to take out the earrings. Daddy reassured her by telling her when he was younger he wore an earring, so he knows how to do it. Her eyes got really big and she said, "You mean you wore earrings when you were a little girl?"

I sooooooooooo miss that age. They are almost enough to make me want to have another one...






Almost






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42 comments:

Sass said...

Fab.
U.
Lous.

My daughter did one of those things for mother's day when she was 5, and also said I was something like...18 or something. So I would have given birth at 13.

Loved it. ;)

Recent blog post: Way Back Wednesday - A lesson in refinement.

dizz said...

That's great! Forever young!

Recent blog post: Kids write/say the damndest shit!

darsden said...

how sweet, I miss my babies so much! I love stories like this!

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Jo said...

Good thing she didn't have to guess a weight. One of my kiddos did that one time. Thankfully, he was very kind.

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dizz said...

I know it.. my oldest is getting ready to graduate high school my youngest MIGHT graduate next year


sigh

Recent blog post: Kids write/say the damndest shit!

Durango Barbie :) said...

That must be the cutest darn 4-year-old EVER!!! Pooty Pooty Pooooooooooooooooooooooooooooo!!

dizz said...

i would be soooooooo scared for my kids to guess my weight.. even now at their age.. I will be checking your blog at lunch when I go home I sooooooo wish I could check it atr work

Recent blog post: Kids write/say the damndest shit!

dizz said...

lol! Good thing you aren't partial or anything!

Recent blog post: Kids write/say the damndest shit!

Shawn said...

That girl's a great artist! Trust me, I can spot one of my own.

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Quirkyloon said...

Aww how sweet! But I totally have to confess of being guilty of the..."go play in your room" one!

Gulp!

Scandy said...

I remember a funny line from my son's Kindergarten teacher at the First Day of School parents' meeting: "Parents, as I Kindergarten teacher, I know that kids say the darndest things, so try not to believe everything your child comes home and says I said at school. And I'll try not to believe all the things they tell me each week."
There were lots of nervous parents in the room!

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ReformingGeek said...

How cute! That last comment made me want to run away screaming though.

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a mouthy housewife said...

thanks for stopping by our blog. I have to say I would love to be five again, although mentally I have to say I'm pretty sure I still am.

If you've got a problem, we'd love to hear from you. We're a lot cheaper than a therapist and a lot crappier too.

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Skylers Dad said...

This is just great. Reminds me of an old joke about a little boy walking in on mommy bouncing up and down on daddy. When he asked what they were doing, she said she was bouncing on daddy's belly to make it go away.

Later on the little boy told mommy not to worry about trying to make daddy's belly go away, because after she leaves for work the neighbor lady comes over and blows it back up.

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Queenie said...

They are so cute at that age.. Princess's bio asshole fed the kids grouse one night for supper.. she came home and told me he made her eat mouse... I was like WTF? I called him up and asked what kind of damn game he was playing.. he said... Honey.. it was game.. it was grouse...

oh.. sorry dear... continue..

Jeff Tompkins said...

I guess I'm going to have to re-write my mom's card before Sunday. Damn.

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blognut said...

Awesome!

Nothing makes me even 'almost' want another kid!

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Spaz said...

Kids are gross and retarded. We should stop breeding. Instead, we should get on stem cells so we can stay 30 forever.

Ok, maybe 25, but no younger.

dizz said...

You should post some of your art for comparison!

Recent blog post: Kids write/say the damndest shit!

dizz said...

yeaaaaaaah That was in my vocabulary daily.. oh well.. it made them stronger!

Recent blog post: Kids write/say the damndest shit!

dizz said...

I wish all kindergarten teachers had that sense of humor.. that is awesome!

Recent blog post: Kids write/say the damndest shit!

MadMadMargo said...

Awwww, how cute. I was taught from a very early age not to tell everything I know for this very reason. My kids were also taught this same principal. Fortunately, we all escaped any major embarrassing moments.

Recent blog post: WANTED: Husband

dizz said...

It was pretty funny!

Recent blog post: Kids write/say the damndest shit!

dizz said...

I have never grown up either.. it's no fun! Thanks for dropping by! I am sure I will need our services soon

Recent blog post: Kids write/say the damndest shit!

dizz said...

I love that joke.. kids are the best!

Recent blog post: Kids write/say the damndest shit!

dizz said...

HA!

Recent blog post: Kids write/say the damndest shit!

dizz said...

Better hurry!

Recent blog post: Kids write/say the damndest shit!

Marissa said...

Hearing the funny things kids say is the only thing that can make me look forward to being a grandma. (I just don't want to look like a grandma.)

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dizz said...

Really?? Occasionally I lose my mind.. I find it again when kid starts crying and I can give it back

Recent blog post: Kids write/say the damndest shit!

dizz said...

You may be on to something Mike!

Recent blog post: Kids write/say the damndest shit!

dizz said...

Lucky you.. I was not so lucky

Recent blog post: Kids write/say the damndest shit!

vodkamom said...

That was great......

Mary@Holy Mackerel said...

Oh god, that mom on dad's back is pretty darn hilarious. And I too bet you it had to do with something else besides giving her a piggyback ride...

Recent blog post: A Mother's Day Sojourn

surveygirl46 said...

You know what's funny though; saying that shit out loud like you ARE 4 years old age and watching peoples reactions.....FUNNY!

Chris said...

Haha. Could not stop giggling at the last comment. Lol. Classic. You should frame that. :)

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The Queen said...

Two things.. the KFC thing even made our little paper here in Nebraska and OC drew your name for the second place prize at the castle.. need to know where to send it.. check out her post on my blog..

otin said...

Lmao at Mom always says go play in my room! Parent translation: Get the fuck out of here! LOL!

dizz said...

You and me both!

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dizz said...

I KNEW you would get a kick out of it!

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dizz said...

That was my first thought. She won't admit it of course

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dizz said...

I would probably get slapped!

Recent blog post: Humor Bloggers Story

SheBloggs said...

Awwwwwww that was so cute! Your a cool mom to keep that!.

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