Saturday, April 4, 2009

Do you want a wet pussy?


I went out with my SIL and her sister last night. We had a great time.
Here are some random things that I can remember


  • Do fish pee? This was a question brought up by SIL. It's a good question. After much thought, asking the Olive Garden waitress and checking Yahoo we found out the answer is yes. Though not like we do. They excrete ammonia from their gills.
  • When trying to alphabetize something, I have to run the alphabet song through my my head to make sure I get it right. My SIL was so relieved to find out that she wasn't the only one who did this. Of course, we asked the waitress. After she took my wine away, she answered... "uh no." She was a great waitress and enjoyed our random silliness. I had to reassure my SIL that I have heard other people at work do the ABC song when filing stuff, that we were not dumb. Well OK we are but that's beside the point. The only reason you all are laughing is because you are happy to learn that you are not alone.
  • Not a lot of people enjoy Prince like the 3 of us do. Our Tar-Jay cashier told us they made them put out his new CD Loutusflow3r 10 hours early because of the "high demand." She said we are the only people that she has seen buy it and that we should be paying her just to ring up the CD. I love it and highly recommend it to anyone with a love for all things Prince SHUT UP! Don't judge me!
  • In pool, playing cutthroat is not you just shooting your balls until they are gone and you win the game. I am not a pool player. My SIL remembered the game, but forgot how it went. As the guy with a missing front tooth explained to us, you shoot everyone ELSE'S balls to win.
  • A drink I used to love and drink all the time years ago, has a new name. It is the Woo-Woo It has vodka, peach schnapps and cranberry juice. When I went to the local bar and ordered it.. the beertender MUCH younger than myself, says.. is that a wet pussy? HUH? I mean I was having a good time and all, but I wasn't THAT excited. She saw my confused look and explained that all drinks have at least 3 names (I guess to keep up with all of the generations) . She said a Wet Pussy has all the same stuff. But you see... it's called a Woo Woo for a reason. When you drink enough of them, you are overcome by this urge to scream out "WOO WOO!" Some how screaming "Wet Pussy!" just attracts the wrong kind of attention.
  • No dear SIL that is NOT your pink lipliner, but blue eyeliner with which you have just so precicesly lined you lips. Too bad you caught it; I was not paying attention. Would have been a good look.
  • I am a rookie at playing "dart fight", a game SIL and her sis made up while I was in the bathroom. I came out and they were practically rolling on the floor with laughter at this fun new game. I tried to play ond SIL sis, explained I was a rookie and was doing it all wrong. She then proceeded to show me the correct way to hold all three darts like a cigarette and battle SIL who was holding them the same way by trying to knock each others darts out by attacking the darts while shaking your hand back and forth. Don't look at me, it was those 2 drunks who made it up while I was in the bathroom remember. OH and I am no longer a rookie. I kicked SIL ass at this new game to by played only while intoxicated and hopefully no one else watching.
  • Only guys with pink mohawks 3 years younger than myself want to dance with old ladies.
  • A girl at the table next to us pissed her pants as a guy explained to his other friends while he pushed her chair away.. Yeah... we thought it was TMI too.
OK so I remembered quite a bit. Besides, it was only a glass and a half of wine, a shot of tekillya and a wet pussy woo woo that we had all nigh AND we left before 11. Yeah.. we're old.

13 comments:

AD said...

Lol.

You guys are crazy.

I'm bike cheese!

SkylersDad said...

Sounds like all were had by a good time!

dizzblnd said...

AD: You could have been a part of it. I like bike cheese!

Chris: We were all had!

Quirkyloon said...

Ha! Sounds like you partied like it was 1999!

Hey I loves me some Prince too.

BTW, after your warning from yesterday's post...I was too ascared to looky loo.

Gulp.

I'm a wet wussy! heh heh

dizzblnd said...

QL: Yep it was a blast! So happy you kept reading lol

ReformingGeek said...

Wow! Between you and Quirky today, my brain is plum full of new knowledge.

For me, I'm asleep after 2 glasses of wine. You stayed up until 11:00 PM? I'm impressed!

Don't forget to check out your roast in my last post!

Shawn said...

Ha, I have to do that same thing with the alphabet. I've never had to do a sobriety test for the cops, but it makes me kind of nervous that I would be asked to say the ABCs backwards. I would be in jail, even if I hadn't had a drink in a week.

blognut said...

I absolutely sing the alphabet song when filing. It's the only way to do it. And, I love Prince. And, who doesn't love a wet pussy?

Under the Influence said...

I do the alphabet thing, too!

The Queen said...

Well, if you do a blow job,, the wet pussy is not an issue. I'm just saying.. I'm a retired bartender,, and a blow job is much faster and less messy than a wet pussy... but they all give you a bloody brain the next morning..

Travis Erwin said...

I'd like to hang out with y'all. I bet this blog title draws some interesting Google searches.

dizzblnd said...

RG: I am so glad you learned something twice today! Thanks for the roast.. it was yummy!

Shawn: Thank you for confessing that.. I feel much better now

Blognut: Wooooooooooohooooo I think we were separated at birth

Jo: Thanks goodness.. I was starting to feel like it was just me and my SIL

Queen: What an interesting drink order.. I can see my drunks self ordering a blow pussy and a wet job!.. I did have a slight hangover

Travis: I dunno if you could handle us lol

Chele said...

love it, you and Laila would have a great time getting drunk together.

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